3. How to step out and be your own kind of beautiful – Jasper Lai

In this episode of #HighlySoughtAfter, I sat down with multi-talented actor and comedian Jasper Lai to chat about his roller-coaster journey to fame. With 114K followers on Instagram, Jasper first ever movie script “Number One” was also recently nominated for the Golden Horse award, widely deemed as the Oscars of the Chinese language film industry.

Pay special attention to (time stamp) when Jasper shared his backstory and how an apparent failure in school set him up for success in the entertainment scene. 
 
Also listen out for his answers to the following questions. 

• How has an apparent failure set you up for your success later? 1:58
• What were the key turning points in your life that led you to do what you do now (acting, hosting and script writing)? 10:00
• Where did you pick up hosting and quick-thinking skills? 20:59
• Recently, you were also with the big guns like Jack Neo and Mark Lee – how did that happen? 21:17
• How do you deal with critics and people who make you the butt of their jokes? 24:34
• Is it true you must be good looking or have a hot body to have a big following? 25:12
• Has cross-dressing and comedy made people take you less seriously? 29:34
• What is your advice to individuals who are growing their following and building their personal brand online? 33:48
• Who is the most popular among the Ah Boys to Men cast? Do you feel inadequate around them? And how did you find your own world? 37:03
• When did you officially know you were “famous”? 47:30

If you want to keep in touch with Jasper, you can reach him on Instagram @jaspersjaspers

Read these books to become highly sought after in your own industry -> www.pickericsbrain.com

Thank you for listening to this episode of #HighlySoughtAfter! 

If you enjoyed this episode, please help me hit the ‘subscribe’ button if you’re listening on Apple Podcasts or hit the ‘follow’ button if you are listening on Spotify. 
 
I would also love to hear your biggest takeaway from this episode! Here’s how: take a screenshot of you listening to #HighlySoughtAfter and tag me on Instagram. My handle is @ericgoesglobal. This way, I can personally thank you!

Transcript

Jasper Lai:

There will be people online that will say, "Oh my God, you're [foreign language 00:00:04]" or they'll say, "Why does a comedian always have to cross dress? Why you have to do this? Why always you like that? Why do you have to be ugly?" Then all the arrows are shooting at you. Of course, I get affected on bad days, and then I start to realize that if you love what you do, you'll do all the =means and ways to get it. 

Eric Feng:

Hi, this is Eric here and you are listening to #HighlySoughtAfter. In today's episode, we have with us a very colorful personality. You would have seen him in, Ah Boys To Men, and for those of you in Malaysia and if you're watching Astro, you will know him as the very hilarious host of [foreign language 00:01:00], it's 'Call Me Handsome.' Now, what most of you would not know is this year he is also going to debut in a movie not as an actor, but also as a scriptwriter. Ladies and gentlemen, join me to welcome Jasper Lai, yay.

Jasper Lai:

Yay.

Eric Feng:

I feel super stressed interviewing you because he really has the gift of the gab. Anything that you will throw at him, he is able to respond and turn it back around. 

Jasper Lai:

You need a thick face.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, a very thick skin helps. 

Jasper Lai:

A thick skin help.

Eric Feng:

Basically guys, I'm looking forward to today's interview because most of us see you either as a comical character or most recently as a drag queen, but I know him as well as a friend. He has a side of him that most people do not know. I always feel that all comedians all have tragic stories. 

Jasper Lai:

True.

Eric Feng:

You're [foreign language 00:01:52], there's light, there's dark. For a person to be extremely funny, there must be a side of you that's tragic or sad.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

Why don't you tell us, and for those people who don't know you, how you ended up being a comedian, actor, writer? How did it all happen?

Jasper Lai:

How did it all happen? The official starting point is because I went to Jack Neo's audition because then they were auditioning for The Lion Men.

Eric Feng:

Okay.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

That was the show before Boys To Men, right?

Jasper Lai:

That was the show after Boys to Men One and Two.

Eric Feng:

Oh, okay.

Jasper Lai:

Then they were auditioning for Lion Men.

Eric Feng:

Got it. 

Jasper Lai:

Then I was one of the artists and I've got one more year and I don't have to do it anymore because I'm not going anywhere. I thought I'd just give myself a chance before I try to give up.

Eric Feng:

So you almost wanted to give up your whole entertainment career?

Jasper Lai:

I would never say, give up, give up, but probably to reexamine my path maybe if I'm not going anywhere.

Eric Feng:

Got it. He picked you and then what happened?

Jasper Lai:

I was very lucky that out of 1000 plus people who auditioned and then they had 20 or 30 of the finalists and then out of this, everybody is fighting for a very good role.

Eric Feng:

Yes.

Jasper Lai:

Because of course, the boys would get the lead role.

Eric Feng:

Correct.

Jasper Lai:

Then you are trying to find something that is the next best.

Eric Feng:

The hero, right?

Jasper Lai:

Right. I was actually very, very lucky and thank you Daniel. [foreign language 00:03:25].

Eric Feng:

See? It's important guys.

Jasper Lai:

He gave me quite a good role which is called [foreign language 00:03:33], the leader of the Black Hawks.

Eric Feng:

Okay. Did Jack Neo tell you why he picked you?

Jasper Lai:

No.

Eric Feng:

He might have regretted you. It cannot be because after that, you were involved in a lot more projects, right?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, yeah.

Eric Feng:

Aren't you curious why people picked you because you know your uniqueness?

Jasper Lai:

Why he picked me then?

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

I guess it's maybe because of the vibe that I was.

Eric Feng:

The vibe you gave, peacock unicorn vibes.

Jasper Lai:

Unicorn vibes, rainbow, rainbow, rainbow. No, then I was a little bit more funny, jovial. I may not have the right skills yet, but maybe the vibe, the aura shone through that.

Eric Feng:

Was your family very supportive of you when you embarked on this entertainment career? Because you know being Singaporean, you be a doctor, be a lawyer, be a teacher but be an actor, singer?

Jasper Lai:

Ladies and gentlemen, if you don't know, Singapore is actually quite a conservative country.

Eric Feng:

I think so, serious.

Jasper Lai:

Especially the parent thing, our parents, especially my parents, they probably wanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer or some CEO of some company, yeah. Because my dad is actually the CEO of some company.

Eric Feng:

Oh, okay. For a different company.

Jasper Lai:

He has a couple of companies, a quite huge one so I've got money. [crosstalk 00:04:56]. Yeah, at a very young age, they always told me, "Study hard and follow the norm, go to a good secondary school." Then thereafter you have to go to JC because in junior college it's easier for you to go to the university. I was actually a bit rejecting of that because at a very young age, I think I know what I wanted to do.

Eric Feng:

Which is?

Jasper Lai:

I wanted to be an artist?

Eric Feng:

Really? It's an idea that's plugged in your head. How come suddenly one day you just decided you wanted to be an artist?

Jasper Lai:

You are definitely drawn to something and more prone to something, right?

Eric Feng:

What were you drawn to back then when you were young?

Jasper Lai:

My mom told me that when I was very young, I used to stand on the deck table and I would try to perform and all these things, which I have no memories of that life.

Eric Feng:

Yeah. We need to find pictures of you doing that, huh?

Jasper Lai:

Too bad. Then there was no iPhone and they cannot take pictures.

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. Then I was very drawn especially to [foreign language 00:06:06].

Eric Feng:

Oh man, I love [foreign language 00:06:17] Monday, it's always Monday.

Jasper Lai:

Every Monday at 8:00 PM. I would definitely sit in front of the video and I would be like, "Oh, I wish I could be in Nancy May's house."

Eric Feng:

Oh my god. Okay. 

Jasper Lai:

Then I was very drawn to being an artist.

Eric Feng:

That's what you were telling your dad that you wanted to be an artist, what did he say to you?

Jasper Lai:

At a very young age, he thought that was a passing phase, like, "Everybody wants to be an artist, so whatever you want to do, just do." Then I wanted to go to some performing arts school. Maybe after secondary school, I wanted to go to Poly to study Mass Comm, which is something a little bit more related to media because then, and I'm 31 this year, then there was any [SOTA 00:07:00].

Eric Feng:

Right, yeah.

Jasper Lai:

There wasn't any arts school.

Eric Feng:

NAFA? NAFA was there already, right?

Jasper Lai:

The idea of doing arts as a career wasn't so popular in our generation.

Eric Feng:

I totally agree, yeah.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. My dad rejected me going to Poly to study that so I had to follow the normal route which is going to JC.

Eric Feng:

"Jasper, go to JC," oh.

Jasper Lai:

J for Jasper and J for JC.

Eric Feng:

Would you guys want to guess which JC you come from? Leave us a comment and see if you get it right?

Jasper Lai:

I'll tell you now, Nanyang Junior College.

Eric Feng:

Nanyang would be very proud of you. I'm from Nanyang Junior College as well.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, you went there before that.

Eric Feng:

Of course, I'm eight years your senior. Okay.

Jasper Lai:

My whole path gets dimmer. 

Eric Feng:

Thanks.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

Wait, wait, wait. What were you studying in Nanyang Junior College?

Jasper Lai:

Science, double Science. I was a pure chemistry, pure bio.

Eric Feng:

Oh my gosh, and C-Mass.

Jasper Lai:

And C-Mass. That was normal as a science stream.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, a science stream.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, after that, I had a lot to do because I studied science, but I didn't want to be a scientist.

Eric Feng:

Fair.

Jasper Lai:

When uni options came about, I said, "I don't want to be a business person so I don't want to go to business school. I cannot be a doctor because my grades weren't that perfect."

Eric Feng:

Okay, so medicine, no.

Jasper Lai:

"I never studied physics, so engineering is out."

Eric Feng:

Yep. [crosstalk 00:08:33].

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, but to me, my perception of arts is I had to write a lot of essays, but my language wasn't that good.

Eric Feng:

I understand.

Jasper Lai:

I was actually very good in bio, so my science in PSAT was A-star and then I got A's all the way from there, but I don't want to be a scientist looking at test tubes.

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

You know what I mean? That was very stereotypical.

Eric Feng:

What do you have left then?

Jasper Lai:

I was left with no options and then I was very happy, yay, I can go and become an artist really because all the universities actually rejected all my choices. I thought I would be very happy pursuing my dream then but my family wasn't trying to root me down and say that, "You have to have a university degree."

Eric Feng:

Yeah, agreed.

Jasper Lai:

Especially a local one, which is NUS and NT.

Eric Feng:

Oh my god, we have the same kind of parents, huh?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. Maybe we are stepbrothers?

Eric Feng:

No, the funnier one.

Jasper Lai:

I was left with no choices. Then NUS came about, they said, "Hey, we have slots in this." My faculty in the end?

Eric Feng:

Yeah. We want to know.

Jasper Lai:

School of computing.

Eric Feng:

Oh my god, computer scientist.

Jasper Lai:

In there, I do all the programming, C++, and Java, oh my god. I see 1-0-1-0-1-0 everywhere. 

Eric Feng:

Then? Do you study and do well?

Jasper Lai:

Of course, I didn't do well. I flunked my whole first semester.

Eric Feng:

Okay.

Jasper Lai:

Not intentionally, I tried my very best, but I got F's and D's for all my subjects.

Eric Feng:

Oh dear, okay.

Jasper Lai:

Things start to get very gloomy at home because I was always the one that studied and I'm very good with my grades. I used to be, but then I suddenly plunged down and I became like all the F students you see. Then my dad was like, "What the hell? What's wrong with you?"

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

I said, "I don't want to study programming." "Then what do you want to do?" "I want to be an artist." "Huh? You're crazy."

Eric Feng:

He said that you're crazy?

Jasper Lai:

He probably thinks that. 

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

Then he brought me to see a psychiatrist.

Eric Feng:

Are you kidding me?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, he brought me to see a psychiatrist.

Eric Feng:

He brought you to a psychiatrist because you wanted to be an artist?

Jasper Lai:

He probably thinks that there's something wrong with my mindset.

Eric Feng:

Oh my god, okay, okay.

Jasper Lai:

I don't blame him then because every parent wants the best for their sons.

Eric Feng:

Back then it was all YouTube I suppose.

Jasper Lai:

It was on YouTube.

Eric Feng:

They don't understand why there are influencers and YouTubers.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

Okay, sure. He brought you to see a psychiatrist.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. According to my dad's description of me, the doctor was thinking, "Oh, I think you have borderline personality disorder." I was like, "Wow. Do you mean that I've been living for 25 years and then I have a mental problem?" I was very amazed because I didn't know that I had a mental problem. The whole session lasted for a year. The doctor, at the end of the day, he thinks, "Hey, this guy doesn't really have a mental issue."

Eric Feng:

They took one year to figure out you have no problem. Good money, yeah? I should be a psychiatrist.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. 

Eric Feng:

Okay. 

Jasper Lai:

Then he told my dad that I know exactly what I wanted to do in life but because I was being tied down by what the society wants me to do, that's why I feel very trapped.

Eric Feng:

Exactly.

Jasper Lai:

You don't feel like you belong, you don't feel that you fit in.

Eric Feng:

You don't fit in.

Jasper Lai:

Right. That's why I guess at that point in time, I had a little bit of depression because I really dreaded myself going to school.

Eric Feng:

Oh dear, okay.

Jasper Lai:

I really felt very stressful every time, and honestly, I still have nightmares.

Eric Feng:

To today?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, I was just sharing with my friends the other day, I said, "Every other month or so, I will still have nightmares about my school life."

Eric Feng:

What does a nightmare look like?

Jasper Lai:

Typical.

Eric Feng:

Okay.

Jasper Lai:

I will be in my last semester in my dream.

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

Then I will suddenly realize that, "Oh, out of five modules, I still have two that I haven't studied." Then I went, "Oh bleep, this is my last semester. If I don't pass, I will definitely get kicked out by the school," and then all the stress and emotions and all the negative feelings will pour into the dream. Then I will feel very, ugh, uptight.

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

I feel very disgusted in the dream and then I will wake up, "Bleep, I need to go to school," and then I have to realize that I'm actually living my dream now.

Eric Feng:

Oh my god, that's scary.

Jasper Lai:

My friend told me that it's some post traumatic thing.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, I think so. You went through quite a bit.

Jasper Lai:

Everyone went through quite a bit to chase that dream.

Eric Feng:

This whole journey that you've been through where your family rejected your dream and eventually they sent you to a psychiatrist and ironically your psychiatrist said that you have no problem and gave you his blessings, right?

Jasper Lai:

[foreign language 00:13:46], he's very good, yeah.

Eric Feng:

Oh, thank you, doctor. What do you learn from this journey? What was one message or one lesson you've learned?

Jasper Lai:

I think one thing, if I can share, is to stay true to what you want.

Eric Feng:

Even if the world says no, do you?

Jasper Lai:

Even if the world says no, and even if the whole world including your loved ones says no, you have to stand firm with what you want.

Eric Feng:

Where do you get your courage from?

Jasper Lai:

I don't know. 

Eric Feng:

If you think about it, just imagine, I put you in an elevator and everybody is facing one direction. Where do you have the balls to face the opposite direction?

Jasper Lai:

Why do I want to face the other direction?

Eric Feng:

Precisely. That's the thing; you wanted to follow your dream sometimes feels like you are going against the whole world. You have to have balls to do that.

Jasper Lai:

It's not like if you're in an elevator and everybody is alighting at level three and then you are the only one that, "No, I want to go to the rooftop." Then you will be like, "Oh shit, can this lift bring me up to the rooftop," and when the door opened, actually it's not the rooftop that you imagined it would be.

Eric Feng:

Fantastic. Okay, I want to ask you something, what would you do? Well, we know what you did.

Jasper Lai:

If the door opened and it's not the rooftop, I would jump down.

Eric Feng:

You would jump? Oh my god. You should not. It's true, right? Many of us today, we are settling a three upon 10 kind of life, knowing that we want a 10 out of 10, but we don't have either the courage or we don't have the faith that if we drop our three upon 10, we can find a 10 upon 10. People are thinking, "If I can't find a 10 upon 10 and I lose my three upon 10, I'm nothing."

Jasper Lai:

Right.

Eric Feng:

What would you say to them, to people like that?

Jasper Lai:

Those people fearing ...?

Eric Feng:

They don't want to settle, yet at the same time, they do not have the courage to go for what they want because they're scared that they may not achieve it.

Jasper Lai:

You see, one thing that I truly believe really, really, it touch my heart and I say it.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, your heart is not there. I think you feel but your heart is not there.

Jasper Lai:

I touch my heart and say that it's really about believing in yourself that you can do it because if you yourself even had that little doubt that you might not reach that 10 upon 10 life, then who can bring you that?

Eric Feng:

Wow. This is a cool moment.

Jasper Lai:

No, really. How should I put it? I watched a video and it's called, The Law of Attraction. I was very surprised about what they actually shared with me in the video, The Law of Attraction. You love this, of course.

Eric Feng:

The Law of Attraction, yeah.

Jasper Lai:

I actually know about the law of attraction and I actually apply the law of attraction before I even knew about it.

Eric Feng:

How did you apply it?

Jasper Lai:

When I was in secondary three, my results were C's and D's. Then there was a 1R5 kind of thing, right?

Eric Feng:

Oh my god, I totally forgot what that was, a 1R5.

Jasper Lai:

You have to be below 20 for you to get into a JC. 

Eric Feng:

Okay, yeah, yeah.

Jasper Lai:

Then my 1R5 was 38 and 40, which probably you can just settle down for a Poly lifestyle, but it was because my school sat us down and watched our seniors getting all their overall results. My principal said the same thing then, he said, "You have to believe in yourself that you can do it. If you believe you can do it, then you can do it," then it was so nice. I had a recorder with me so I actually recorded the whole phrase of it.

Eric Feng:

Yes.

Jasper Lai:

Then when I was trying to study for my overall, I replayed it every time. No, I'm serious, I would play it every time and then I closed my eyes and then I imagined that I'd get five A's, okay? Then I hear her sound, it's like God. I hear her sound and her voice says, "You can do it, you can do it and you just have to believe in that." I always imagined myself getting five A's and my principal called my name and you stand. That's what they do in secondary school.

Eric Feng:

Yes, yes, correct.

Jasper Lai:

I got into such an over extreme type of phase whereby I wrote all the physics formula and math formula on the wall beside where I sleep.

Eric Feng:

Yeah. 

Jasper Lai:

Then when I sleep that time, I would always record all the formulas and the five properties of life, no, they don't bend, blah-blah-blah-blah. Then I would listen and then I would go to sleep. I did so many things. Then you have to remember I was a failure, I got an F, I got a C, I got a D. I was expected to fail. Then I was brainwashing myself and telling myself that I can do it and I really believed I could do it and I really thought that I saw myself standing up during my overall results release.

Eric Feng:

Then do you?

Jasper Lai:

Then when the overall results came out, they called my name.

Eric Feng:

Okay.

Jasper Lai:

I got five A's.

Eric Feng:

Ah, oh my god. Guys, I did not know about this, sorry.

Jasper Lai:

I stood up and then I cried.

Eric Feng:

Oh. 

Jasper Lai:

Then I have no idea what the hell is the law of attraction. 

Eric Feng:

The secret, yeah.

Jasper Lai:

The secret, right?

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

Then it was really years after that and somebody wrote a book about it. Then I was reading it and I was watching the video, "Hey, that was exactly what I was doing." Then I know that I have to apply this formula into my career.

Eric Feng:

Yes. 

Jasper Lai:

That was why I believed in myself so much.

Eric Feng:

Because you'd already seen yourself succeeding in your career, it's in your mind.

Jasper Lai:

Not in an arrogant way.

Eric Feng:

No, of course.

Jasper Lai:

Not in an arrogant way, but you just have to believe in yourself.

Eric Feng:

Amazing. 

Jasper Lai:

It's easier said than done but for those that think, "I want to go to 10 upon 10. I want to settle for 10 upon 10, but I might be an eight," then you will never reach 10.

Eric Feng:

You first need to see that you're worth it, that you're worth 10 upon 10, then you can seek it out.

Jasper Lai:

Then you work your work your way to 10 upon 10.

Eric Feng:

Ah, that was so good. Have you ever thought about being a motivational speaker?

Jasper Lai:

I'm waiting for you to recruit me.

Eric Feng:

All right, I'll recruit you. I'll bring you to my world, man. Oh my god. There's a saying that everything is created twice, first in your mind and then in your reality. You just said that. It's amazing that you really saw yourself succeeding and the only reason you can see yourself succeeding is that you see that you're worth it.

Jasper Lai:

Imagine then when I was in my primary school slot, eight years old, nine years old and I was watching [foreign language 00:21:08].

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

I imagined myself inside Nancy May's house because I wanted to be inside the house so much to bring happiness to people. 

Eric Feng:

I think you did, right? I remember I was in Kunting and I saw you, your photo, with Jack Neo, Mark Li, right? 

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, yeah.

Eric Feng:

Tell us more about that. How did you manage to get that gig? Tell us what that gig is.

Jasper Lai:

I don't really how I got that gig.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, tell everybody about what that gig is and tell us how you got it.

Jasper Lai:

Well basically, it's a concert. In Chinese, it's called [foreign language 00:21:35], and in English it's, The King of Comedy.

Eric Feng:

Okay.

Jasper Lai:

I was really very, very honored.

Eric Feng:

You were the youngest on stage there?

Jasper Lai:

I was the youngest and [foreign language 00:21:45]. 

Eric Feng:

You refused that you have the competence and I disagree.

Jasper Lai:

I don't even think that I deserved to sharing the same stage as them because they are really my [foreign language 00:21:57] and my idols.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, you watched them when you were young.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. Imagine you are standing together with [foreign language 00:22:02]. Then they would be like, "Huh?" Yeah. Then Jack Neo and in Malaysia another king of comedy, Jack Li, Mark Li, Harry [Tia 00:22:15], they were all my idols when I was young. This is a concert where they gather all the comedians of Singapore and Malaysia.

Eric Feng:

Yes, correct.

Jasper Lai:

Then we had a concert thing in Kunting and in resorts.

Eric Feng:

Okay, yeah. Not just that show, but how did it happen? You were in Ah Boys To Men, you were playing a supporting character and then shortly after that, I see you started to do a lot more shows with the big guys. How do you end up being mentored personally by Jack Neo and all these people? How? How do you do it?

Jasper Lai:

I honestly what I do. Okay, I have to say that honestly, I really don't know why they find me.

Eric Feng:

You should really find out.

Jasper Lai:

I really don't know why they find me and I'm very honest about it.

Eric Feng:

Mm-hmm (affirmative). I can hear.

Jasper Lai:

Working alongside with them is really amazing, yeah. Okay, I'll explain it this way, it's very difficult putting it into words, sorry, if you've got to put so much in words.

Eric Feng:

No, no. Take your time.

Jasper Lai:

How should I put it?

Eric Feng:

Put it in Mandarin if you can.

Jasper Lai:

You have to be unique, you have to be unique and to be unique and to stand out is about being yourself.

Eric Feng:

Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Jasper Lai:

Look, there are so many artists out there and there are so many comedians or the comedians want to be or the artists who want to be.

Eric Feng:

Yes, absolutely.

Jasper Lai:

For me to be alongside with them, I really don't know why, but I would guess it's because every one of them is also very unique. When you are unique, you fit into the pie.

Eric Feng:

Very nice. What do you think is your uniqueness?

Jasper Lai:

Me?

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

I don't know. What do you think?

Eric Feng:

Me?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. What do you think?

Eric Feng:

Obviously you're very young.

Jasper Lai:

Young is not unique.

Eric Feng:

On that stage, you were the youngest guy.

Jasper Lai:

Okay, okay.

Eric Feng:

I think you don't take yourself seriously. I feel that that is your strength?

Jasper Lai:

Huh?

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

I take myself seriously.

Eric Feng:

No, that means that when people make fun of you, you're not offended. Genuinely, you're not offended and you are able to turn it around and make everybody look good. I'll give you a case in point. I remember watching one of the interviews with you. I think it was for the Army. You were telling people that you were from Astro, call me Handsome, and everybody laughed. Then the emcee was saying, "Huh, you? Call you Handsome," and that your face can't go on a show like that. If I were you, I would feel offended, but you said, "Well, call me Handsome and I make my face like that, then handsome becomes more handsomer." It was so natural for you. Aren't you offended that you are sometimes the butt of people's jokes?

Jasper Lai:

No.

Eric Feng:

Why?

Jasper Lai:

Because being the joke is part of my work. 

Eric Feng:

Okay, now you totally actually blew my mind because I have no idea what you mean by that. Okay. Let's break it down; being a joke is part of your work. Give me your differentiation.

Jasper Lai:

Because I bring laughter to people, right? So whatever ways that I can do that as long as it brightens up your day, it really works.

Eric Feng:

Wow, it reminds me of Patch Adams.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm nowhere there, but it's the same formula. Of course, you don't have to feel bad or offended because that is a fact. This face is not a handsome face in the first place. You're go and click [foreign language 00:26:13] over here and you can see all the really nice and handsome guys, look, look, look, look, look.

Eric Feng:

So many.

Jasper Lai:

You put me beside them and obviously it's the fact that I'm not handsome, and he's right by being blunt, why should I take offense about it? 

Eric Feng:

In fact, if you are also handsome, you're probably going to fit in and you wouldn't stand out.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. That's why you have to find your unique starting point because when everyone is so perfect and everyone is so handsome, why chase to be the next handsome one? I know that if I go for surgery or whatever, even if I had a six-pack, I would still lose to somebody. Why can't I be just me? 

Eric Feng:

Yes. And be the best version of you.

Jasper Lai:

.. And the best version of myself and then accept yourself for who you are because once you accept yourself for who you are, you are invincible.

Eric Feng:

Can I break it down for you? I'm sorry, I love breaking things down. I think what I'm learning from you so far is number one, you need to accept yourself for who you are.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

Right? Then once you accept yourself for who you are, then you can believe in yourself, believe the best for yourself and then you can go for it.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, for example, people laugh at me and say, "[foreign language 00:27:32]." 

Eric Feng:

[foreign language 00:27:34], people from the Philippines.

Jasper Lai:

"[foreign language 00:27:37]"

Eric Feng:

[foreign language 00:27:38] is very effeminate.

Jasper Lai:

Very effeminate or very flamboyant, a very nice way that call it.

Eric Feng:

I like flamboyant.

Jasper Lai:

When I was young, I got bullied about it. I got very affected about it. I was like, "Why?"

Eric Feng:

Why what? Why are you like that or why did they say that to me?

Jasper Lai:

"Why am I like that and why do they call me that?"

Eric Feng:

Yeah. 

Jasper Lai:

I never found out and then I realized that you don't have to find the answer because in a way, whichever God you believe, they made you this way, right? If you accept yourself for who you are, that becomes your strength.

Eric Feng:

Yes.

Jasper Lai:

That part of me was actually part of an essence of the Call Me Handsome show because when you are yourself and you don't imitate people, then nobody can become you anymore.

Eric Feng:

Then you become the most like you.

Jasper Lai:

Then you are the unique one because everybody will try to follow you. People, they want to be flamboyant, but they want to follow you to be as successful as you are, but they can never. They can only copy you, but they can never be you.

Eric Feng:

That's why they say it's better to be different than to be better because you find your own uniqueness.

Jasper Lai:

Now you can call me flamboyant, you can call me anything, you can call me fat, you can call me ugly, whatever you want to call me because I have accepted myself for who I am. Of course, there are times where I'll be like, "Ugh, I wish I could be better." 

Eric Feng:

After looking.

Jasper Lai:

After looking at it.

Eric Feng:

Hey, this is Eric here, just dropping in to check in on you. Are you getting value so far from this interview, because if you are, I'm very happy for you and I'm really curious what are some of the key takeaways, so after the interview, go to social media, screenshot your learnings and tag me so that we can connect. Okay, okay. I'm going to leave you to listen to the rest of the interview. Enjoy.

            You started cross dressing. Why?

Jasper Lai:

Wait, wait, wait, wait. I never started cross dressing.

Eric Feng:

Yes, drag queen?

Jasper Lai:

No, no, no, no.

Eric Feng:

Okay, I'll give you a chance to explain yourself.

Jasper Lai:

I think all the cross dressers would point a gun to me.

Eric Feng:

Really? Why?

Jasper Lai:

No. I did start cross dressing.

Eric Feng:

Okay?

Jasper Lai:

That's not why. Okay, cross dressing was never my forte.

Eric Feng:

Okay. Guys, let me explain now because he just showed me a picture of himself, very gorgeous looking and I was appalled that it was actually him.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

You really good as a girl.

Jasper Lai:

It's all right. Now you can call me the slut of the street.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, you just helped me find myself.

Jasper Lai:

I don't want viewers to think that I'm actually a cross dresser.

Eric Feng:

Then what are you? What is a better word?

Jasper Lai:

I'm a comedian.

Eric Feng:

A comedian, okay.

Jasper Lai:

Whichever way I can do to make people laugh, I'm okay to do that. If you want me to have bad teeth, you can slap me, you can make me cross dress, you make me roll on the mat, whatever you want to me, as long as I bring entertainment value on your planning table, then I have done my job to make the world a better place.

Eric Feng:

Wow.

Jasper Lai:

Right?

Eric Feng:

Okay.

Jasper Lai:

According to cross dressing, okay, yes, I did some on shows.

Eric Feng:

Yeah. How was it like?

Jasper Lai:

Honestly, I was a little bit uncomfortable at first because I'm still a very sensitive guy so I would still feel like, "What if people look at me and then they would ..."

Eric Feng:

Yeah, judge you.

Jasper Lai:

Then my self-confidence wasn't that high.

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

At first I was, [inaudible 00:31:20]. 

Eric Feng:

Also it was something that you wanted, the producer or the director was telling you-

Jasper Lai:

No, it's something that I suggested to them.

Eric Feng:

Oh my god.

Jasper Lai:

Because I felt that it would bring up the entertainment value a little bit more.

Eric Feng:

Got it.

Jasper Lai:

But it's something that I might not have prepared myself for the backlash.

Eric Feng:

Was there? Was there backlash?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, there would be definitely a lot.

Eric Feng:

Really? What kind of backlash?

Jasper Lai:

Oh god. There would be people online that would say, "Oh my god, you're [foreign language 00:31:52]," or they would say, "Why does a comedian always have to cross dress? Why do you have to do this, why always are you like that? Why do you have to be ugly?" 

Eric Feng:

Ugh.

Jasper Lai:

Then all the arrows are pointing and shooting at you. Of course, I get affected on bad days. Then I start to realize that ... How should I put it? If you love what you do, you will do all means and ways to get it. I tend to realize after these few years that what I love to do is actually to entertain people. Then I will put myself in difficult positions to do that so as to entertain you.

Eric Feng:

Very nice, so just keep it truthful, finding new ways to entertain people.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. Then for all the backlash, I think as long as I ask myself, I'm just doing whatever I can to entertain. It might not be your cup of tea, but I could be someone else's cup of tea.

Eric Feng:

Well said.

Jasper Lai:

But because you put yourself out there in the media, you get a lot of applause. You will definitely get a lot of boos. If you want to be there, there, there, then you have to be prepared to get booed. If you are not prepared, then you don't deserve it and don't even start there. Just be a normal person.

Eric Feng:

Someone said to me, he showed me a coin and he said that, "If you allow yourself to be affected by applause, which is one side of the coin, then you have to be prepared for criticism, which is another side of the coin."

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

There's two sides of the coin. I guess that's what you got yourself into, right?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

You're okay with it. How do you deal with it? Do you have a process, because the people watching this, they're also building their brand online. One of the biggest concerns they have is, as you put yourself out there, which is important in business, you're going to critics and you're going to get haters. The truth of the matter is critics and haters are way louder than your supporters. It gives you the perception that maybe everybody hates you.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah.

Eric Feng:

Do you have tips for them? How do you deal with it?

Jasper Lai:

Just continue to keep doing that you do.

Eric Feng:

In spite of all this?

Jasper Lai:

In spite of it because one day when you succeed, then this naysayer will shut up.

Eric Feng:

Ah. So focus on the purpose, focus on why. Your why is you want to entertain people.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, my why is to entertain people.

Eric Feng:

Unless my why is to seek validation of ourselves.

Jasper Lai:

Yes.

Eric Feng:

That's our conscious side, that why we do that, right?

Jasper Lai:

Yes. They have people that will do it for the likes. There are people that do it for applause. If I were to do all of these things for applause, then I would get affected, but if I'm doing all these things for the purpose, which is to entertain people ... There was one day I was at a coffee shop and I saw this uncle watching [foreign language 00:34:53] on his phone.

Eric Feng:

Yes. Wait, what is [foreign language 00:34:54]? Tell me.

Jasper Lai:

[foreign language 00:34:55] which is the newer [foreign language 00:34:57] version, every Friday. It was on YouTube. Then I saw him laughing and it was at some specific point at my jokes during the show. He probably didn't realize that I was there.

Eric Feng:

Yes.

Jasper Lai:

There was a warming in my heart, because they don't laugh to show me, they laugh because they genuinely like it. 

Eric Feng:

Yeah, exactly.

Jasper Lai:

That's my purpose in doing all these things, is to bring laughter to, back to what you were saying, branding, is to bring happiness, joy and laughter to people from all walks of life because there might have been some secondary school chap that said, "Eh, this comedy stuff is bleep."

Eric Feng:

Yeah. 

Jasper Lai:

Or some uncles are like, "[foreign language 00:35:50]," or whatever. But hey, out of 100 people, as long as I can brighten up one person's night, I've done my job.

Eric Feng:

Wow. Guys, this is Jasper Lai, a side of Jasper that we don't get to see, so altruistic. It's amazing.

Jasper Lai:

For me to find this branding is not easy.

Eric Feng:

Tell me more about it. What do you mean?

Jasper Lai:

Okay. I will share with people, it's always to be true to yourself. That is the first thing. It's to be true to yourself. To be true to yourself has different levels.

Eric Feng:

Okay.

Jasper Lai:

First, I'm true to myself by chasing after my dream. Okay, I did that. Once you chase your dream, then you realize, "Shit, so many people are also chasing their dream. So many people are being true to themselves." Then you tend to get lost in the sea of people also.

Eric Feng:

Yeah. 

Jasper Lai:

Yes, congratulations getting to second level, but you might get stuck at second level. It's just like when I was shooting Ah Boys To Men. You know the boys quote is always, "Wha, bruddah."

Eric Feng:

Bruddah, ah, ah, ah.

Jasper Lai:

Bro.

Eric Feng:

Okay, bro.

Jasper Lai:

I was happy with them, honestly, because they are soul brothers, but at some point, in me, along that way, I tend to realize that I lost myself.

Eric Feng:

Oh. Why?

Jasper Lai:

While chasing my dream and being true to my dream, I lost myself. 

Eric Feng:

What do you mean by you lost yourself?

Jasper Lai:

I wear a lot of down colored clothes because that was the bro-code, you see. Every time we go to a formal, we always wear black.

Eric Feng:

That's the bro.

Jasper Lai:

Bro.

Eric Feng:

Can you imagine every day, all black, all black that you wear? [crosstalk 00:37:54]

Jasper Lai:

I tried my best to fit in and they tried their very best to help me along with that because I'm really after the hype [foreign language 00:38:05].

Eric Feng:

Ah Boys Three, right?

Jasper Lai:

Boys Three.

Eric Feng:

Because Boys One and Two first, then you came in?

Jasper Lai:

Lion Men, yeah. They really did embrace you. I was the rainbow sheep of the family.

Eric Feng:

I like how you say it, the rainbow sheep.

Jasper Lai:

They were the black sheep, but I was also the rainbow sheep of the family.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, too bright. Did they accept you?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, they accepted me for who I am but because we have to go on the media, we have to look as a boy band model, right?

Eric Feng:

Yes, a boy band.

Jasper Lai:

As a boy band, we are literally like a boy band in a movie context. 

Eric Feng:

Ah.

Jasper Lai:

Then for three years, one day I suddenly opened my closet and I realized, "Oh my god. All my clothes are black," because I used to wear very, very colorful clothes, but it's a little bit too over.

Eric Feng:

Oh, okay.

Jasper Lai:

Then I realized, "All these black clothes." Then I realized, "Wow, I've changed." Of course, to some extent I have changed to the better with skills and all.

Eric Feng:

But you lost a little bit of yourself.

Jasper Lai:

Trying to fit into it, I lost a part of me. Then that's when I moved onto other productions in other countries. As a boy band, as a group, we do a lot of franchising of Ah Boys To Men Three, Ah Boys to Men Four, Lion Men One, Lion Men Two. I became [foreign language 00:39:44], right?

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

When I had a chance to go solo, my chance was actually in Malaysia. I actually got into Call Me Handsome and the comedian shows in Malaysia.

Eric Feng:

Correct.

Jasper Lai:

That was my breaking point in a way. I realized, "Oh, I get a chance to go solo."

Eric Feng:

It was your turning point, I would say. 

Jasper Lai:

It's a turning point. I get a chance to go solo, "Oh, it's a new start for me," especially in another country. I get to become another blank piece of paper and restructure myself and see if I can find myself back.

Eric Feng:

Yes, okay.

Jasper Lai:

I tend to be a little bit more daring. I wear my style. I try to be a little bit back to my flamboyant style.

Eric Feng:

Colorful.

Jasper Lai:

Colorful. I find, wow, I'm happy. That was when, whoa. That is me. Do you know how to find you?

Eric Feng:

Yeah, how?

Jasper Lai:

When you've lost yourself, then you can find you.

Eric Feng:

Wow. Well said. Sometimes you need to lose yourself to find yourself.

Jasper Lai:

You have to lose yourself before you find yourself because you'll never know who are you until you've lost it. Then it'll be Eric is not so disorganized one day or Eric is a very blah-blah-blah. How can I become like that? Then you realize, you are an organized person, you are a very truthful person, blah-blah-blah-blah-blah. The same as me, hey Jasper is a colorful person. Jason is not a row person, maybe he's more like a sis person, sisterhood, or something like that. Jasper might not be suit the very cool, cool type of look. Maybe he's more like a colorful type of person. That's when I lose myself, I found myself back.

            I had to thank my brothers. Because of them, I get to be very versatile. Now you want me to come back to the band and be very cool and serious. Ah Boys To Men, I can do it because I trained myself to stretch my reach from just flamboyant.

Eric Feng:

You know who you are.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. I get to find out who I am, yeah. 

Eric Feng:

Being an artist, sometimes you can lose yourself because you play so many roles, you don't know who you are. You put on so many masks, you forgot that actually this mask that you put on is actually not you.

Jasper Lai:

There's a misconception, and I might not be right, but people might think that, "Oh, you lose yourself because you have done so many roles." I think you lose yourself because you have encountered so many people. You try to get acceptance of all these people.

Eric Feng:

Wow.

Jasper Lai:

That's when you lose yourself.

Eric Feng:

The role you play is because we try to seek validation.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. 

Eric Feng:

In branding, acting?

Jasper Lai:

In branding, it's the same, right? Maybe you are now trying to brand yourself as, "Okay, what are you trying to brand yourself now?"

Eric Feng:

I don't know that, I do know.

Jasper Lai:

No, you Eric Feng. You are well known and well respected.

Eric Feng:

Hey man.

Jasper Lai:

How can you not know?

Eric Feng:

Well, the tables have turned. Obviously, your mission is to be-

Jasper Lai:

Happy.

Eric Feng:

... Not just be happy, but to bring laughter, right? My mission is to, first of all, be a positive influence to people and to help my followers be a positive influence to their world, in other words, to be a light in their world. That's why I'm doing this show because if you see that star? It's a star, but it's not alone. It's all about encompassing everything and to be as big a world as you can, right? You see this star? It can be a big star, it can be a small star. It doesn't matter because our definition of our world is different. Some of our world is just Singapore, some of our world is the globe. Some of our world is just our family. Who cares? Nobody judges you, but can you be the light of that world of yours? It drives me.

Jasper Lai:

You have to stay true to that branding, right?

Eric Feng:

Yeah. It took a while to find that though, because I was trying to find my branding by looking at others. That's why I say I love how you do it, your process.

Jasper Lai:

Bro.

Eric Feng:

Yeah? If you call me bro, can I be your sis?

Jasper Lai:

Sister.

Eric Feng:

Sis, yeah. I love it.

Jasper Lai:

[foreign language 00:44:08] This video will come out and [crosstalk 00:44:09].

Eric Feng:

That's okay, that's you.

Jasper Lai:

No, no. 

Eric Feng:

What, what?

Jasper Lai:

You might think that I've got it easy.

Eric Feng:

No. I'm sure you did not get it easy. We spent about 20 minutes plus and we found out that you stumbled to find it.

Jasper Lai:

I try to fit into the industry or I tried to find my branding for what? Eight years? Maybe I know. Maybe subconsciously you know.

Eric Feng:

Yeah. 

Jasper Lai:

You know that you want to do comedy and all these things, but when people try to ask you, "What's your branding," you don't know.

Eric Feng:

You don't know.

Jasper Lai:

You know exactly what it was. I have to be very thankful because I get a lot of good mentors. 

Eric Feng:

To help find you?

Jasper Lai:

To help find me and they help me to shape.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, to find your positioning.

Jasper Lai:

To find my way, to my positioning, the thing that is so important.

Eric Feng:

Wow.

Jasper Lai:

I only got my way probably one year or two years, but it was because of this one year or two years, my career actually kicked off.

Eric Feng:

Exactly. I think it was the last two years?

Jasper Lai:

It was the last two years.

Eric Feng:

But it was also in that moment where you realized that you just want to be yourself. Can you say that? That there was that moment where you found yourself and then you be yourself?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. 

Eric Feng:

Could it be?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. 

Eric Feng:

What do you think was the turning point for you? It's very obvious, your career. Yeah, Ah Boys To Men was good, but boom, I see you everywhere now. I see you with the big guns there. 

Jasper Lai:

Really?

Eric Feng:

Really, it's true. It's a fact.

Jasper Lai:

Thank you, thank you.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, but what was that turning point? I saw you change your mind, you accepted yourself and you believed in who you are. You have the positive. No, more like you were seeing what you want.

Jasper Lai:

Correct.

Eric Feng:

But what else? What else changed for you in that moment that caused you to go become you.

Jasper Lai:

The same thing that I say, which is when I tried to be myself and I had not tried. When I decided to follow who I really am and make who I am to become branding. That's where people define you more, like, "Oh, he can do that very well. Let's get him to do it." That's why I get the chance to host Call Me Handsome, which is one of the biggest variety shows in Malaysia.

Eric Feng:

I get it. Let me see if I can summarize for you. What you're trying to say is that you found your differences and you found your positioning. Then when you have clarity in who you are and the Jasper that you want to show the world, people go, "Whoa, I know who he is now and I like that," and that's when you get a lot of shows.

Jasper Lai:

The differentiations, and then people will integrate you into the equation.

Eric Feng:

Equations, and a computer scientist.  I think that's your favorite, right? See?

Jasper Lai:

No, excuse me, I got a C.

Eric Feng:

Ah. 

Jasper Lai:

A C. You see, to me, that was my turning point to others, but then again, I don't know how to put it. It's never about being famous for me. Of course, I do get affected if my followers drop, but it's a social problem.

Eric Feng:

I'm sure after this talk show, you'll have more followers for sure, because we get to see another side of Jasper.

Jasper Lai:

Follow me at Jasper now, now, now. Follow, follow, follow that. Continue. You see, I don't know how you put it. I really have to say that my so-called success now is not because of me. It's because of all the mentors that gave me the opportunity, okay? It's always about the right timing.

Eric Feng:

Okay. 

Jasper Lai:

The right timing.

Eric Feng:

All right.

Jasper Lai:

You have to let them feel that you are worth mentoring.

Eric Feng:

How do you do that? That's a good one, that's a good one. How do you let the people that you really admire want to mentor us?

Jasper Lai:

First, you have to be very genuine. You have to be very, very, very genuine. Then in Chinese, I call it, [foreign language 00:49:11]. 

Eric Feng:

Okay. So sometimes you've got to eat humble pie? Sometimes you don't get what you want, but it's okay. Is that what you meant?

Jasper Lai:

In Singlish, it's [foreign language 00:49:22]. Don't be so calculative even if today if I were to help you, I might not get anything, but I might lose money or I might lose something, but it's because over the years, and it takes time to build up this reputation of yours because people are skeptics when you're trying to be nice to them or when you're trying to be very helpful.

Eric Feng:

They feel that you want something.

Jasper Lai:

You want something. 

Eric Feng:

Yeah.

Jasper Lai:

You have to show them that you are willing to give.

Eric Feng:

And keep giving.

Jasper Lai:

And keep giving.

Eric Feng:

Even if you don't get anything back.

Jasper Lai:

Even if you don't get anything. That has to come from your heart.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, so generosity.

Jasper Lai:

Generosity. When they know that and they truly feel that you are not there to snatch my pie, you are willing to share your share of pie, then alongside I share my pie with you and then you share your pie with me, you have to get people to know that you are very generous and you are very genuine.

Eric Feng:

And you want to help.

Jasper Lai:

And you want to help. When they truly feel that, then they will want to help you, but it doesn't take one year. 

Eric Feng:

Yeah. Eight years for this career.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah, but I've been in my original company which is J-Team for six or seven years.

Eric Feng:

Wow.

Jasper Lai:

It takes a very long for people to really settle down their mind and think, "Oh, so he is nice to me not because he wants something back. He is nice to me because he is nice." I'm not saying I'm nice, nice, nice.

Eric Feng:

It came from a good place.

Jasper Lai:

I try to be as generous as I can. I share my contacts. If one day you want to do something, I'm very generous, "Hey, this is whoever, so-and-so. Come out and have whatever, lunch, coffee. I can treat." Fine, as long as my friends get what they want, I'm good with it. The same to you. One day if you have an opportunity, you will first think of me.

Eric Feng:

Yeah. I think it's what we call abundance mindset, right?

Jasper Lai:

[foreign language 00:51:45] in Chinese.

Eric Feng:

Explain, [foreign language 00:51:50]. What does it mean? What does [foreign language 00:51:56].

Jasper Lai:

Study Chinese, ladies and gentlemen, when you are young, okay? 

Eric Feng:

Oh my god. [foreign language 00:52:03] means what? You use your heart ... Reciprocity.

Jasper Lai:

Study English.

Eric Feng:

Reciprocity. Ah, I get it now.

Jasper Lai:

Okay.

Eric Feng:

There's this guy, and you probably don't know him, his name is Zig Ziegler and he says this, "If you want to have everything in the world, first help others get everything they want." It's that mindset. Wow. 

Jasper Lai:

See, there are so want-to-be people, and at the end of the day you have seen so many want-to-be people and they are very calculative, but this interview, I will probably be known as [foreign language 00:52:37].

Eric Feng:

[foreign language 00:52:38].  One follower.

Jasper Lai:

Who might not have money, who might or might not have exposure, get a transfer fee for me.

Eric Feng:

No, money grabber?

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. I look at my time, I look at my [crosstalk 00:52:58].

Eric Feng:

Is that how people think? That's how the celebrities in the world think?

Jasper Lai:

Okay, a celebrity that can reach that level means that they have already forgone the security. They have already reached this stage, that's why they can be who they are.

Eric Feng:

Wow.

Jasper Lai:

A lot of people are stuck at this level because they can't break through of this calculative mindset. You see, I do this interview with you because we are friends, and I do this interview because I can feel like maybe my story can help inspire somebody.

Eric Feng:

Not just somebody, a lot of people.

Jasper Lai:

I don't ask for anything else.

Eric Feng:

Yet somehow or other, because you are of the generosity mindset, you will start getting a lot of things. 

Jasper Lai:

Like attracts like. That is the law of attraction.

Eric Feng:

Attraction again.

Jasper Lai:

It's the law of attraction again. I will make friends that think alike like me.

Eric Feng:

You never know who is going to watch this. By the way, this show doesn't just go out to Singapore and Malaysia, it's the entire Asia.

Jasper Lai:

Asia director. 

Eric Feng:

It does that a lot. I need to say to you, one of my followers, she is a big fan of yours and her name is [Yung Yin 00:54:08]. She said that you got into Ah Boys To Men because somewhere on TV you said, "Daniel, please put me into your movie." Is that true?

Jasper Lai:

I did that?

Eric Feng:

Yeah. She said you did that.

Jasper Lai:

I don't know. 

Eric Feng:

And you just did it again. Ask and I'll put you in the team.

Jasper Lai:

Ask and you shall receive.

Eric Feng:

Exactly. You don't ask [inaudible 00:54:26].

Jasper Lai:

Because people nowadays, they are very [foreign language 00:54:30] to ask. They are very embarrassed. They say, "[foreign language 00:54:33]." 

Eric Feng:

Okay. Mr. Jack Neo, I would love to be in your Ah Boys To Seven.

Jasper Lai:

No, it's five.

Eric Feng:

Going on five? I need two years to do surgery first. [crosstalk 00:54:51]. For sure, I ask.

Jasper Lai:

Then again, it's because it's my branding and I'm a comedian. When I do that, people might take it as a joke. Some people might take it seriously.

Eric Feng:

No. Please guys, in the business world and in the sales world, you better ask because if you don't ask, the answer is always no, and no is not really no. No is just not yet.

Jasper Lai:

Yeah. 

Eric Feng:

You've got to figure out how to get a person to say yes.

Jasper Lai:

There are so many people that want that pie. 

Eric Feng:

Yeah, they cut their own half.

Jasper Lai:

Boom, out of your thing already.

Eric Feng:

Cry?

Jasper Lai:

[foreign language 00:55:23].

Eric Feng:

I love to hear it. I get it. You have to stay at the hustle, the balls to ask, the balls to be yourself, yet at the same time, inversely, you need to be genuine and you have to be generous and things start to come. 

Jasper Lai:

Be yourself.

Eric Feng:

Jasper, thank you so much for being on #HighlySoughtAfter. Your story is so going to inspire somebody.

Jasper Lai:

Thank you. I hope so.

Eric Feng:

In closing, could you give all of our followers and the people watching you right now, advice? And advice for those of them who are building their brand online and offline, what would you say to them that will help them in their journey?

Jasper Lai:

Well basically, if you want to build yourself-

Eric Feng:

Yeah, you can look at the camera.

Jasper Lai:

Basically if you want to build yourself online and offline, you have to be true to yourself. Don't make another fake self to please other people. You just have to be genuine to your dream, genuine to your goals, genuine to yourself, because once you are yourself, nobody can copy you. You are unique and you are the only one to this brand. Try not to be somebody just well loved. Be somebody well respected. Don't seek for likes, seek for respect because that will last longer in the run.

Eric Feng:

Whoa. This is you, next step, become a speaker. So good advice.

Jasper Lai:

I'm going to snatch your snitch.

Eric Feng:

The snitch is big enough for you, a colorful personality.

Jasper Lai:

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Highly Sought After. I'm your host and this is Eric. 

Eric Feng:

Hi, I am the guest right now. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for spending the hour with us. This is Jasper Lai. I will look forward to introduce more interesting people to you so that you can also become highly sought after. See you in the next episode.

Jasper Lai:

Follow me, follow me. Here, here, follow me.

Eric Feng:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. 

Jasper Lai:

Share, share, share, follow me, follow me. Follow me. Follow me.

Eric Feng:

All right, bye. So good. 

            Thank you so much for listening to the entire interview. I trust that it was valuable to you. Now it would mean the world to me if you could write me a review, so who knows? Your review may be featured in the very next episode. What are you waiting for? Go. Go, write a review now. #HighlySoughtAfter.